Preface

Oh, the places you'll boldly go!
Posted originally on the Ad Astra :: Star Trek Fanfiction Archive at http://www.adastrafanfic.com/works/579.

Rating:
General Audiences
Archive Warning:
Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category:
Gen
Fandom:
Star Trek: The Original Series
Character:
Ensemble Cast - TOS
Additional Tags:
Poetry, Remix
Language:
English
Stats:
Published: 2023-07-04 Words: 712 Chapters: 2/79

Oh, the places you'll boldly go!

Summary

Retelling each of the TOS episodes in the style of Dr Seuss.

(Crossposted from AO3.)

Notes

There will eventually be 79 of these. All I hafta do is force myself to rewatch the terrible episodes like "Spock's Brain, The Way to Eden, The Savage Curtain", basically all of season three, lol.

One Ship, Two Ship. Warship, Starship.

Chapter Summary

The Ultimate Computer

The project’s creator was Dr Daystrom.

Whose brain was much brighter than John, Dick or Tom.

“M-5 is superior!” he shouted with glee. “It will function without guidance in zero-g!”

“It will learn and grow it’s synthetic mind sense! My theory to test I’ll need to forth hence!”

Five giant silver craft were directed in haste, to reroute for new orders with no time to waste.

One of the five, the computer will steer. The remaining four, with false weapons, fly by quite near.

Minimal assistance to M-5 for test. Most of the crew could stand back and rest.

Two ship’s play fight re-parry a success, offensive technique now for those crews to guess.

Live ammunition shot through vacuum, striking two ships in red, fiery plume.

Next M-5’s programming turned a disheartening fright, it totaled a freighter in distorted delight.

Too smart, too smart the computer became. It refused commands and evolved less than tame.

Creator Daystrom refused to destroy, he’d been dreaming of M-5 since he was a boy. His obsession grew and grew til he was unstable, which programmed into circuits and allowed to enable.

Psychotic break renders Daystrom subdued, a neck pinch more efficient than other methods more crude.

The M-5 experiment now deemed a bad and wrong choice, the ship must stand down without use of a voice.

Good fortune and luck for those one and all, command of one ship sees the surrendering call.

The Hex from a Vex of a Boy with an X.

Chapter Summary

Charlie X

Two ships meet in space to transfer a boy, whose captain from one he did annoy.

Young and immature at seventeen, the crew of the science ship found him quite mean.

Stranded alone in a crash as a tot, to live with his own kind was his life’s new plot.

From small ship to large ship he was so forth moved, briefs on his antics were never behooved.

At his first sight of the Yeoman named Rand, he thought her a girl of who’s face was so grand.

In love he fell right then and there, out the door he was rushed without breaking his stare.

Questions arose about how he survived, the story he told felt somewhat contrived.

The emergency rations he’d had were diminished, two years after crashing they should have been finished.

Mysterious beings’ intervention became theory, but their existence was never observed and remained just a query.

Aboard this new ship the boy remained a misfit, unknown to the crew that they’d ired his wit.

Unapproving of his hand to her butt, Yeoman Rand quickly diminished the boy’s strong-growing strut.

Agreed to a dinner to discuss acts not right, the boy shows his powers with tricks of mind slight.

He watched with his crush a recital of song, performed as warning of where to the Commander’s love did belong.

Silence was wrought unto voice and to harp, the jovial teasing the boy thought too sharp.

Attention he gave to the cards in his hand, provocative pictures he conjured of Rand.

Days go by as his advances are shunned, a man made to vanish while sparring leaves the captain quite stunned.

His powers grow and grow til they can’t grow much more, in an act of defiance he disappears a whole door.

He walks around in control of the ship, no good are the phasers attached at crews’ hip.

During a battle of wills alien legs do get broken, mobility restored after captain’s need for him spoken.

Control of the ship by a teen of no remorse, action to be taken without use of force.

Distracted the boy got with extra whistles and bells, empty threats he yelled out of painful death knells.

Over-worked with all circuits firing full blast, the boy stood watching the viewer aghast.

Ghostly green ship at the bow did appear, its sight made the boy cower in fear.

Apology came from an omnipotent being, escape did the boy from their overwatch seeing.

Their existence confirmed to be true, they’d adopted the hurt toddler as part of their crew.

Their powers they gave as part of his life, regret at his misuse gave them great strife.

Pleading and pleading the boy made to stay, someone to touch he wanted some day.

Too weary from battle and fight, blind eyes turned away from his recapture that night.

Afterword

End Notes

The Ultimate Computer

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